James Hoskin's

The Rules:

Gather friends (if applicable) around the television. Place alcoholic drinks within easy reach. Watch "Star Trek Voyager" drinking when instructed to by the following rules. In case of confusion over whether or not to drink, always err on the side of drinking. Enjoy!

Take a sip if:

• Chakotay toes the Starfleet line against his fellow Maquis.
• Chakotay makes goo-goo eyes at Janeway (or vice-versa).
• Janeway says report.
• Janeway says do it.
• Janeway stands like Robin Hood.
• Janeway touches another member of the crew.
• Kes tells the EMH about his bedside manner.
• Neelix bullshits about knowing about the area of space they're in or the people there.
• Neelix trys to help. (two if it is useful.)
• Paris trys to corrupt Kim.
• Torres calls Kim Starfleet.
• Tuvok points out the logical course of action.
• The EMH says please state the nature of the medical emergency.
• The EMH is upset about not being turned off.
• The EMH makes a smartass remark.
• Voyager's warp nacelles fold up.
• The bridge is hit and everyone falls out of their chairs.
• Someone mentions being 70,000 light years from earth.
• A crew member has a photograph of their family/lover/dog back in the Alpha Quadrant.

Take a gulp if:

• Chakotay does some sort of Indian ritual.
• Chakotay mentions his ancestors.
• Janeway's hair comes out of the bun.
• Janeway fixes her hair during an emergency.
• Janeway says they don't have some sort of luxury.
• Kes has a private session of mental training with Tuvok.
• Kim pulls a Wesley.
• Neelix recites a recipe.
• Neelix cooks something involving mildew, fungus etc.
• Torres gets angry or has a fight.
• Tuvok sits in his corner of the mess hall.
• The EMH says please turn to your emergency medical holographic channel.
• The EMH leaves sickbay.
• The EMH is unsympathetic.
• Q turns up.
• Voyager fires one of their precious and unreplenishable photon torpedoes.
• Someone complains about Neelix's cooking.
• Someone mentions the need for spare parts for Voyager.

Chug your entire drink if:

• Janeway demonstrates her deathwish.
• Voyager lands on a planet.
• Something else from the Alpha Quadrant is in the Delta Quadrant

Drink everything in sight if:

• They ever get home.

Disclaimer:

This is a game. This is only a game. The game might get a little hectic at times and no responsibility is taken for hospitalisation of any players. If drinking alcohol (I personally recommend this), do not drive. Do not operate heavy machinery. Do not pass go. Do not collect £200.