James Hoskin's

A junior school teacher collected well-known proverbs. She gave each child in her class the first half of a proverb, and had them come up with the rest.

• Better to be safe than - Punch a 5th grader.
• Strike while the - Bug is close.
• It's always darkest before - Daylight Savings time.
• Never underestimate the power of - Termites.
• You can lead a horse to water but - How?
• Don't bite the hand that - Looks dirty.
• No news is - Impossible.
• A miss is as good as a - Mr.
• You can't teach an old dog new - Math.
• If you lie down with dogs, you'll - Stink in the morning.
• Love all, trust - Me.
• The pen is mightier than the - Pigs.
• An idle mind is - The best way to relax.
• Where there's smoke there's - Pollution.
• Happy the bride who - Gets all the presents.
• A penny saved is - Not much.
• Two's company, three's - The Musketeers.
• Don't put off till tomorrow what - You put on to go to bed.
• Cry and - You have to blow your nose.
• Children should be seen and not - Spanked or grounded.
• If at first you don't succeed - Get new batteries.
• You get out of something what you - See pictured on the box.
• When the blind leadeth the blind - Get out of the way.

She then asked each child in her class to come up with their own proverbs.

• Never trust a dog to watch your food.
• When you want something expensive, ask your grandparents.
• Never be smart to a teacher whose eyes and ears are twitching.
• Wear a hat when feeding seagulls.
• Sleep in your clothes so you'll be dressed in the morning.
• Never try to hide a piece of broccoli in a glass of milk.
• Don't flush the toilet when your dad's in the shower.
• Never ask for anything that costs more than five pounds when your parents are doing their taxes.
• Never bug a pregnant mum.
• Don't ever be too full for dessert.
• When your dad is mad and asks you, "Do I look stupid?", don't answer him.
• Never tell your mum her diet's not working.
• Don't pick on your sister when she's holding a baseball bat.
• When you get a bad grade in school, show it to your mum when she's on the phone.
• Never try to baptize a cat.
• Never spit when on a roller coaster.
• Never do pranks at a police station.
• Beware of cafeteria food when it looks like it's moving.
• Never tell your little brother that you're not going to do what your mum told you to do.
• Remember you're never too old to hold your father's hand.
• Listen to your brain. It has lots of information.
• Stay away from prunes.
• Never dare your little brother to paint the family car.
• Forget the cake. Go for the icing!